Saturday, April 16, 2011 x 12:48 AM
DEPRESS.that is my feeling right now at 12.48 am in the morning. I still can't believe that I actually spilled water all over the guy who is a friend of the restaurant's boss. like just how much worse could the whole situation get.I actually lost balance of the tray and I myself am clueless as to how it happened though I think the guy's hand kinda blocked my way and I leaned in more than I usually do and ended up titling the tray.though my manager did not scold me, I still felt really miserable and I felt like a sinner and I still do.I have failed and disappointed my manager's faith in me as a good waitress.but this is life. there are always obstacles and mistakes that we make and if we don't learn to forget and move on, we will be miserable forever.Recently, I have had a lot to think about and many things that I am feeling confused about. Sometimes, I really wish you would not be so nice to me and help me so much. I wish you did not ever call me by that name, than I would not ever waver in my promise to myself. I keep asking myself just how much of the boundary am I willing to push. we are really far apart and we are so different and I know it is impossible but your care for me makes it hard for me to entirely ignore everything.I wish I knew whether you are joking or being serious, and what do you really think.I will admit, that seeing you just makes me really happy but is my happiness just an imagination on my part or do you really make me feel happy?
